Adulthood

I have never quite understood the concept of childhood. Maybe that is because I feel as if I never got to fully experience childhood considering I was forced to “grow up” and help taking care of younger children at the ripe age of ten. From that moment on life was not about me and my wants anymore; there were other people and other responsibilities to be attended to. With two younger siblings, school, and a rigorous dance and cheerleading schedule, I quickly became accustomed to routines and taking care of responsibilities.

Childhood was no more. I was mature and “wise beyond my years.” Everyday struggles were not the end of the world to me during my high school years, as they were to some of my friends. When I lived with my dad and was responsible for everything I did or needed—including food and school supplies, I didn’t throw a fit. I simply went to work, and bought the items I needed. Of course there was some disdain towards my father, but those stories are for another time and post. It was life and it went on; I never gave it much thought.

My fiancé and fellow blogger has recently been giving the concept of adulthood thought. This of course leads me to give the concept considerable thought as well. To me, being adult was always what was expected, the “right” thing to do. Adulthood was about taking care of responsibilities and needs first, and wants and desires second. The adults in my life did just that. They awoke, took care of their kids, went to work, and came home. Upon returning home is when wants could be met, mostly because responsibilities had previously been taken care of for the day. I never associated maturity with adulthood, I do not see as if they are connected. Maturity is a whole different concept, again, for another time and post.

My fiancé sees this point of view and equates it to valuing “economics over ethics,” or “compromising your values for a check.” Sense I have seen and know the individuals he grew up around, I can clearly see his point; however, I again differ. Some people act this way; however, I would question their maturity. They may be encompassing some tenants of adulthood—taking care of responsibilities. However, I would question if their “check” is in fact being used towards responsibilities or wants. What people often leave out when they are “teaching” young children about adulthood and the ways of society is the need for balance.

And that is ultimately what adulthood is about—balance. Balance between taking care of responsibilities and needs and taking care of wants and desires. Find a balance between ethics and economics, between values and money, between work and love and social. Adulthood is about being comfortable with who you are and accepting the struggles in life and finding the balance to make it all work for you. Make it work for you, not everybody else; not your parents, not your partner, not your teachers, but for you. That is what adulthood is really about.